Exploring The Infinite Abyss

Quite possibly my favorite thing about my new house is that I have a perfect view of the horizon. Everyday I sit in my quaint little kitchen and watch the sun set behind the trees. I watch the sky illuminate with a cascading exuberance of pinks and oranges, as though the sun has saved it’s most glorified passions for it’s last moments with us. Everything seems to slow as it moves down behind the horizon, making way for the moon. The world is struck in awe of it’s beauty, sparkling in the anticipation of twilight. I am struck with a kind of sublime contentment I had never imagined possible.

Tonight I left the warmth of the kitchen and wandered out into the backyard to watch. I looked up to discover 13 pigeons sitting in the rafters of the deck above, waiting for the sunset along with me. They cooed and prodded at each other, looking not unlike a group of antsy children waiting for a movie to begin. Two of them sat off to the side by themselves, curled up next to one another like old lovers. I chuckled a little to myself, thinking how funny it is that pigeons can so often resemble us.

A door slammed, and even though there were only 13 pigeons, it sounded as though a thousand wings had begun to move all at once. They rushed and hovered above me, ferociously flapping their wings before catching a breeze suitable for coasting along with. I think that must be the most wonderful feeling in the world, to float so carelessly above the earth, sailing across the heavens on sporadic gusts of wind. The pigeons fluttered among the falling leaves, dancing and swirling in the frigid air. I watched them intently, dreaming of a freedom as natural and pure as theirs, dreaming of their kind of peace. I chuckled a little to myself, thinking how funny it is that we can so often resemble pigeons.

By the time the sun began to set, they were gone. I stood in the middle of the yard and watched it alone, listening to myself breathe. It’s amazing how quiet it can get in the middle of Manayunk. I often forget how wonderful and valuable it is to take time and stand alone in silence. In a world of endless distractions (namely TV and the internet), I neglect to take time to just think, to listen to the universe and it’s many splendors. Sometimes it feels as though all of the many mysterious of life can be solved in an hour of self reflection.

Everyday I stand by my window and think of this, staring out into the infinite abyss that lays before me. Nietzsche once said “if you gaze long into the abyss, the abyss also gazes into you” and how true it is. The wonders of the universe are reflected in my eyes as I look in search of them. Everything in my life is a reflection of how I view it, a product of my subjectivity. I have created what I see by the way that I see it, just as you have created the world as you see it, and we move onward through the abyss, into the future that lies somewhere just beyond the horizon.